Tuesday, April 7, 2009

T shot ya!

Hey peeps!
I saw this 22 fact thing on a random blog I ran across and I likes it so you know what that means!!!!! The idea is to post just facts that no one would know with out you telling them, no explanations. Here we go!
1. I don't like most vegetables.
2. I can play four instruments
3. Besides God, music is my best friend
4. I get along with males more than females
5. I picked my favorite color to go against the grain and just kept it.
6. My favorite color is green
7. I had a quick temper as a kid
8. I like being a weirdo
9. I consciously changed my accent after I moved up North
10. Child pageants weird me out
11. I used to golf, I could only do well when I got pissed off
12. I've seen ALOT of movies
13. I have brothers but was raised mostly as an only child
14. I have a thing for electronic gadgets
15. I've liked the same guy for FOUR years
16. I'm a commitmentphobe
17. I have a rare turtle
18. I prefer Black and White pictures
19. I'm afraid to try hard drugs
20. Secretly, I like dressing up in pretty dresses
21. I sleep with a teddy bear
22. I believe in ghosts





YES WE CAN be random

Monday, March 30, 2009

You cant handle the truth

Whazzup?! Remember that? If not check it out..


I picked that version cuz Laz Alonso made a lil' cameo there at the end..and we all know how much I heart Laz (and if you dont know now ya know..)
I was totally about to post about this disturbing situation I had this evening but upon further inspection, now that my blog is no longer private and anyone can just wander through, I've decided to censor it so that I dont incriminate my self or others in the process. LOL! So. Nothin happened. Nothing..at all...If you want to know PM me and I'll share the info with you lol!

In the meantime "yes we can" tell lies and all that shit lol!

Friday, March 13, 2009

Fuck up List

I forgot to post about the heffa at the ATM who broke it this afternoon. I was in a rush cuz I had forgot my insurance payment was due and AAA dont be playin about they money. They will qut yo ass..fa real. I called and told them I was gonna be two days late with a payment and they told me that not only were they going to send my payment through once it bounced they were gonna send it back and THEN cancel my policy! WHAT THE HELL?! Anyway, I rushed out to the ATM and in front of me stood Keisha in all her Friday glee.




Like this but with more Baby Phat swagger. Now boys and girls, what would she be doing to piss me off other than breathing Gods good air? Was it
A. Talking on the phone REALLY LOUD
B. Textin someone, prolly her baby's daddy while arbitrarily pressing buttons on the machine
C. Rummaing through her purse like it didnt belong to her
D. All of the above?
YES! You guessed it ALL OF THE ABOVE! What the peach cream? She was killing me HARDLY! She was so loud I couldnt hear the cries of my soul as I squashed it's plan to bash her head in with a bottle of windshield wiper fluid. Then she hangs up the phone and starts TEXTING?! What.the.fuck? While she's texting she starts randomly tapping buttons and takes out like 200 American dollars..over THREE transactions. WHAT WHAT WHAT?! Why didnt she just do it all at once? Then she starts digging in her Baby Phat purse and counting money like she didnt know how much she needed! Then she wanders away because the machine is broken and then walks back to it looking dazed. I REALLY wanted to kill her. Instead I went inside, before she could gather the brain power to make the same decision, and made my transaction in like 3 minutes! Whoever you were, I hate your dreams and ambitions.
This is for you



Yes We Can (bother the hell out of me)

Silverfish

I for the first portion of my life was pretty much a tom-boy. I was raised with three older brothers and their friends. Not to mention my mom being a life long tom-boy her damn self. Dont believe me peep exhibits A and B:


A.


B.

Look at that HAIR! What the hell was she thinking?! And the platform white kicks with the 99? What you know about that?! LOL! *
I digress...
I played sports and hung out with the boys and even played the instrument least frequented by girls, the french horn, in band. There were just two things I refused to do. 1. Get dirty and 2. Be in the vicinity of bugs. Bugs creep me the HELL out! All of them. Even ants. I hate them. When I was younger I'd RUN, like take off like I was at the blocks, at the sight of bugs. I understand they have a purpose but I'ts not in my life. When we moved to this house there were a crapload of Centipedes here. A crapload! For those of you who dont know what this UNGODLY looking creature is BEHOLD!


I almost threw up finding this picture. Sersly.

The straw that broke the frickin camels back was when one ran past me while I was sitting on the floor! What kind of household do you live in where you cant even sit on the damn floor undisturbed? HUH?! I quickly called Orkin and they've been coming ever since.


like this but cooler

He got rid of all my bugs and we continue to pay him. So why in the hell did I just kill a silverfish kickin it on my platform bed! WHAT THE FUCK?! This is not okay! For those who dont know what these bitches look like BEHOLD..AGAIN!


They're like Centipedes lil cousins so I understand why it could be in the house BUT WHY THE FUCK WAS IT ON MY BED?! They frequent bath tubs and sinks for the water..MY WOODEN BED HAS NO WATER ON IT!
Oh shit. It just occured to me that I leave glasses of water on my night stand overnight. What if it lived in one? Oh God. I have to go throw up.

YES WE CAN (kill bugs)
* I grew out of it! It just took me a decade or so.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

blogging while drunk

Hola,
I know, I know baby, it's been a while.. I've been extra busy lately and I at least tried to post some things right? RIGHT? Anywho, Life has been super so lets update kay?




Yeah, my mom has a New, Newer, Newest boyfriend. He's a simpleton like Forrest.Rather Bubba from Forrest. And his breath smells. And he didnt graduated high school, not even middle school. And he's unemployed. And thats all I have to say about that.




I've become a twitter addict. I blame diddy.


*
This is my new Bestie Jamie! Say hello! I love her, she makes me smile. Also, she's one of the few people on earth I feel actually understands my comedy so yeah. SHES A KEEPER!

There are many more things that have changed including my Wii Fit scolding me, what the fuck?, but this booze is kicking in and that Anthony Hamilton is calling my name! Listen for yourself!



Can we be in love with singers we will never meet?
YES WE CAN!

*That is HER picture, that she took HERSELF! I didnt do it!

Saturday, December 13, 2008

EXactly.

For that one guy



Monday, December 8, 2008

16 random things

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 16 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 16 people to be tagged.
You have to tag the person who tagged you.

1. Some of you may know this and some of you may not but I am in love with cheese. It is my favorite food of all.frickin.time! It makes my heart sing. When I go to my grandparents house the first thing they ask is if I want some cheese, everyday, without fail. I blame my grandfather because when I was a kid he'd sit with me on the porch and feed me Kraft singles. Yummy the memories!

2. Though loud as all get out with people I know, I'm kind of shy around strangers. I believe in feeling people out before speaking to them.

3. Along with Emma, I talk to myself. I think it's a sign of genius... or extreme selfishness. One of the two. I don’t think some of my thoughts are appropriate for friends. That’s all. I too talk to inanimate objects, but I also appropriate feelings for them. For instance "are you sad Mr. Book? I didn’t mean to smoosh your cover." or "Mr. Coat noooooooo!".

4. UT chopped and skrewed me. I went to go apply for graduation and they told me I had enough for a Science teacher. I dont like teaching. How does this help me? I have talked to my advisor about being a doctor for 4 years! What does she mean!? Nothing to be done about it, but they stroked me. So, not only was I gonna be there another year anyway after needing to take time off when my mom got sick, I'm gonna be here longer to finish up the remaining 14% of my pre-med program. Sweet. I LOVE the idea of having kids at 79! Can you say sextuplets?

5. I have senioritis. Bad. I hate school and everything about it. I have been in some form of school for 20 years. It hurts my soul. The only reason I didnt say f'it after number 4 happened is because I refuse to give those hatin bastards the satisfaction and I will say "CLEAR!" one day damnint! I find it hard to get up and go to class, I feel like that old kid who rides around the high school 3 years after graduation. Gross!

6. I look at peoples shoes. If you know me, I've judged you based on your shoes before. Dont feel bad, I approved, lol! I dont know why, my shoes are nothing spectacular it's just something I always do.

7. I am a music head! I love everything about music. It fills me with joy, no joke. I can play the flute, french horn, piano and now the electric guitar. I want to learn to play the sax and the trumpet sometime next year. If I didnt want to be a doctor, I would surely change my major to music. Music is the great equalizer. It speaks without words. It is one of the few things that brings me to tears on a regular basis. I LOVE IT and you should too!

8. I'm leery of males. In general. No exceptions. Except Jesus.

9. I hate driving with passion and fervor! I hate sitting still for long periods of time. I didnt get my license until I was 21! I had no problem receiving rides. None. My mom did have a problem with this. Hence the license.

10. I am a phantom napper. I've been an insomniac for as long as I can remember so naps are necessary. What sets me apart is that I dont want people to know I nap. I'm not a lazy person and I hate doing nothing. When I'm off work I find meaningless things to fill my time with. So the idea of me sitting around napping and wasting precious daytime minutes kills me! I lie about it sometimes. I cant help it, I'm so ashamed. And wasteful.

11. My mom is my best friend. I dont mean that in some sort of strange cliché way. She is seriously my best friend. I kick it with my mom all the time. She is the person I share my secrets, most of them anyway, with. When that Golden Girls song comes on, I think of her. I love her to pieces!

12. I have a vast knowledge of useless information. Seriously. It is well known that if you want to know something strange and obscure, call Tiara. If I dont know, I'll google it on the spot! I love google. It completes me. I also have a vast knowledge of song lyrics and movie quotes, no not just quotes, movies. Most movies I've seen I am able to quote with surprising accuracy. It's freakish. One of my "friends" calls me the rain man of useless knowledge. I'm so proud.

13. I'm a little afraid of the dark. Not every day downstairs at night dark, creepy basement dark. Sleeping over at a strange new place dark. Coincidently some nights I have to make it pitch black for me to go to sleep. I'm a conundrum.

14. I LOVE ANIMALS! I love them soooo much it's ridiculous. I get really sad when I see a dead animal on the road. I will swerve, within good common sense, to miss squirrels. That Human Society commercial, with the Sheryl Crowe song, makes me cry EVERY TIME! I'm a sucker for them and they know it!

15. I'm tryna get right with Jesus. I must admit that in the last few years I have strayed, considerably, from the path that the Lord has set out for me. I can see the results of what happens when you have come out from under the Lords protection, for instance NUMBER 4!, and am trying very hard to get back. Hell is not a joke! Now, I'm no Kevin Webb, LOL, but I am trying to strengthen my relationship with God.

16. I secretly hate those "above the influence" commercials. Those are dramatic dramatizations! They talk about not letting people rule your life or tell you what to do, but arent they also suggesting what you should do? I dont think that we should pass out weed to the kids, no I know the effects of that and it aint okay, but they should be raised to be strong minded individuals not lead by anything else but their conscious and God.

HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY

HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY
sure