The Incredible Lightness of Me

There but by the Grace of God...

2010-01-20T23:00:00.001-08:00

..Goes I.
I just heard this story about a girl my friend coaches. She's only 13, in 8th grade and she's slorin in a MAJOR way. She's already known as a school bop. For y'all not from round these parts a bop is a whore or a thirsty(for male attention)male/female. They had to send her home early because multiple girls wanted to fight her for slorin around with their significant others..You know how Lil' kids are..blame the other female instead of asking why "your man" was even in that situation. Now, the next part is intense. Not just because of her age but because of the gravity of the situation. Why don't you have a seat...go ahead. I'll wait........Okay. She was caught on the side of her apartment building having sex with two boys...yeah. She was in one of two situations that I wont go into because these are children and that's porn. Whats worse is that the ENTIRE school knows. This is sad for a multitude of reasons. First, the obvious, WHY IS A THIRTEEN YEAR OLD FUCKIN TWO DUDES?!! OUTSIDE?!!!!!! What does she dislike about herself so much that she would allow herself to be used in this manner? Second, where the FUCK is her mother? This kid is still in school, still on a basketball team, still kickin it with dudes?! What the EFF?!! If the entire school knows, why dont her parents? Does she have parents? At least one? If this child is not only sexually active but sexually advanced it's clear she learned it from somewhere so I'ma just come right out and say it.."who is touching this child?" Even in our overly sexual society little girls aint fuckin two dudes..OUTSIDE. This is a learned behavior. Why dont her parents care? Why the fuck hasn't a school official had a "come to Jesus" meeting with her?! Why?!
I was molested as a kid. I dont hide that fact as I have nothing to hide from. I know that pain and I know that shame. What upsets me is that I had support. I had someone tell me that there was nothing wrong with me. That I was good and priceless. I can only look at what this kid does as a cry for help. A loud one. Someone needs to sit down with her YESTERDAY and get to the bottom of this. Someone needs to get her out of whatever situation she's in that has her so low. I dont know why I wrote this. I guess I just wanted to put that out there. If you have a daughter/sister/niece/cousin/auntee(you know who ya'll are) hug her and tell her you love her. Tell her she's priceless and loved. Tell her no man is worth her sanity or her body.Tell her something. Yes we can.

To Yoshi

2009-12-06T22:10:00.000-08:00

Today I am feeling some kind of way. I'm not really sure which way exactly. Just aware that its a feeling and that its indescribable. I feel joy because were in such a good place after a long time of not being. I feel sadness because I sometimes feel that all my energies and efforts arent reciprocated. I feel silly for feeling that way. I feel anxious at not knowing whats next and I feel wound down at the lack of control I am experiencing for the first time in my life. I am sad because youre not here and angry that I didn't ask you to stay and powerless because I couldn't. I feel stunted at the inability to express myself fully to you and cold and distant at the sub par effort. I feel jaded that you havent tried as hard and even more jaded because you probably don't know how. I feel safe when I'm near you and confined because I cant tell you so. I feel hesitant at asking what the next step is and excited to find out what that exactly is. I feel thankful that through everything you waited for me, patiently and skeptical as the reasons why you waited, patiently. Then ungrateful for my skepticism. I feel warm then cold, then warm, then cold then numb and nothingness. Then angry because the feelings are tied to you and then calm. I feel everything all at once and nothing all along. I just wanted to put this out there. In case you read this. I feel.

Pimpin aint easy?

2009-05-21T21:09:00.000-07:00

Soooooo...The following post may or may not have happened. That is all.

So I recently decided to quit the pimp game. I know, I know..true pimps never quit but let me tell you how it went down. Lets name everyone first shall we?
Guy 1: That One Guy. I've talked about him before. I like him..like, like-like him.
Guy 2: Mr. Laundry List. Dude from high school. We were cough..close..cough friends. Now we're just hanging out. This is the guy who I almost posted about a couple of weeks ago.
Guy 3: Mr. Officer. Now, he's not a real cop and he got his name for other unrelated reasons, it's just funny okay? He's a newbie. I met him at my job he smelled good and had nice waves. Enough said.
Guy 4: Mr. Grinch..he..doesnt really count with his fairweather ass.
So, the only one of these people I have feelings for outside of warm fuzzy friendship feelings is That One Guy and I didnt think of myself as a psuedo-pimp until earlier this week when a series of events took place that sent my entire house of cards cascading down upon my head.
Monday I get a call from Mr. Officer, he wants to hang out this week. Now, the first thing you have to know about pimpin is that all your hoes..I mean..friends need special "me" time. I said sure and we made a tenative date for this afternoon. Later that day Mr. Laundry List calls. He's been tryna catch feelings for a few weeks now. He's not understanding the concept that I dont like him in that way and we had actually stopped talking for a few days because of his crazy behavior. He's upset because he knows about That One Guy and Mr. Officer and he doesnt want me spending time with them. I told him to read the script over and know his role and left it at that. Today Mr. Grinch called. Again, he doesnt count as we rarely see each other and its on some "I dont have anybody to see this movie with do you wanna go" type bullshit. He inexplicably wants to kick it..you guessed it Friday afternoon. I had no problem telling him no. He becomes upset, wonders about how I have so much time for everybody else and I cant even kick it with him once or twice a month. He's clearly confused about his role as well and as a good director I explained it to him again. This afternoon I get a call from Mr. Officer, he wants to hang out this weekend instead of Friday. This isnt good for me because 1. I have to work this weekend and 2. That One Guy would be around in there somewhere and out of all of them, he gets priority booking. I figured that now was as good a time as any to just come clean. He was really upset. Like..really. He thought that we had the makings of a relationship. Oops. I explained myself and the situation and he proceeded to go.the.fuck. off. Normally I would have exploded as well but I realized his anger was justified. After he had calmed down we discussed the situation. And what is the situation you might ask? Well, I like men. I always have. There is something so intriguing about maleness and I like to surround myself with them. It could be on some "daddy never hugged me" type mess but I heart them. Now surrounding myself with them and even entertaining more than one at a time doesnt mean I sleep with all of them. I only sleep with one person at a time, I dont have that nasty womans disease. This is in no offense to any of ya'll who like to double dip, it just aint me. I also need attention, what can I say? I'm the youngest child and the only girl. Without male attention I feel...I dont know, foreign? So because That One Guy lives in a different city I search for said attention elsewhere. Why not? I'm not technically doing anything wrong and I'm not ciphering any attention away from whatever it is that we have. I always make sure I put him first. So yeah. I decided today that this shit is not only confusing it is tiresom. So I offically denounce my pimp hand. It's weak as hell anyway. I'm just gonna revel in the friendships, the real ones not ones I flirted to gain, with males that wont interfere with the rest of my life, whatever that is.
Whew! Felt great to get that out!
Yes We Can..stop pimpin!

yup again

2009-04-25T23:15:00.001-07:00

It is far too difficult to break off pieces of my affection for you
Crumble them up in tiny bits to smash into the corners of your pockets
I can no longer distinguish the parts of you from my own
and I feel that if I were to try
My core would be chipped away to nothingness and my soul would be left uncovered;
rotting in the brilliance of your smile
So instead of handing you shards of my broken being, I'll cut and paste us together
Sew us into one and cover over both our souls with the clay of our flesh
That way nothings too hard, no ones alone and nothings too difficult.

yup

2009-04-12T21:44:00.000-07:00

Reaching out a helping hand grasping in the darkness at nothing
You have once again failed to keep up your end of the bargain
How can I help you up if all you extend to me are fragments of time
Diamonds of sand slowly falling from the sky scattering across the ground
Helplessly held back by your own blockades you refuse to accept help
Running away while looking back you call out to me to save you
I cannnot pull you away from yourself. It is an impossible feat.
All I can do is reach.

Swear Jar

2009-04-08T23:48:00.001-07:00

"Can I borrow a pen?....Can I borrow you're fucking pen?"

Yes We Can..swear!

Uniquely me

2009-04-07T23:20:00.000-07:00

For most of my life I have been a weirdo. Not just a little weirdo...a BIG weirdo! I'm bizarre. I cant help it. Let's discuss this.

just look at that cuteness!

When I was very little we moved down south. My mom had a penchant for moving into neighborhoods with little or no Black people in them. She liked to be a trendsetter. Because of this I developed a love for Golf, Alternative music and Guitars. I was also exposed to the horrors of racism in the dirty South. Fair trade.

just the guys

I was also raised with all boys by a feminist mom. Lots of dungarees in my childhood. Lots. I had alot of male traits as a kid. I hung out with all boys, I got into sports in a big way. It was the only way my brothers would let me hang. I also got really into gaming. I can kick most dudes ass at StreetFighter. I liked Science a predominantly male field. My brothers are 5,6 and 7 years older than me. Add to that the fact that my father and his family were absent for the majority of my formative years, I was pretty much an only child. I learned to be by myself and therefore internalize most of my conversations. I laugh when people call me quiet cuz my brain is loud as hell!

Strangely, the schools I went to in the South were...shall we say...further along than the ones up North. Consequently when I moved up North I found them slightly behind. I was done with school Junior Year. I went another to hang out..and because you weren't allowed to do anything else here in God's Country. I also became somewhat Afrocentric. I love my race and the amazing things about us!

believe it or not, I was smarter than you were at this age

I have dealt with alot of things that people my age couldn't dream of. These things have aged me more mentally than my peers. So...what do ya get when you add all of that together?

ME! A 23 year old pre-med student with a penchant for random facts that don't matter to anyone, music, movies, games and electronics. I also have troubles with my feelings. I hate commitments and would really rather not be tied down. Hence me liking the same guy for 4 years. I'm nowhere as expressive as other chicks my age. I'm emotionally stunted lol. I like clothes no one else will. I pick weird animals. I listen to music my friends have never heard of. I HEART Manga (Naruto Shippuden is my shit!) I love black and white photography (it makes our skin look soooooo good). I love black men with passion and fervour (especially nice smelling ones with waves that make me nauseous) I have a passion for black Greeks. They go through alot for their passion and I will too one day. I love the Lord and I think sex is amazing. Indie Rock is my shit. I like domestic activities and I get WAYYYYY too into History and Literature.
I used to be annoyed with people calling me a weirdo now I embrace it. I've realized it's not so much being a weirdo as being different. And by being different I am being myself. God placed us here to be different. So today I challenge you to get like me and be yourself.

Aint I a cutie?

YES WE CAN (be ourselves)

T shot ya!

2009-04-07T22:51:00.000-07:00

Hey peeps!
I saw this 22 fact thing on a random blog I ran across and I likes it so you know what that means!!!!! The idea is to post just facts that no one would know with out you telling them, no explanations. Here we go!
1. I don't like most vegetables.
2. I can play four instruments
3. Besides God, music is my best friend
4. I get along with males more than females
5. I picked my favorite color to go against the grain and just kept it.
6. My favorite color is green
7. I had a quick temper as a kid
8. I like being a weirdo
9. I consciously changed my accent after I moved up North
10. Child pageants weird me out
11. I used to golf, I could only do well when I got pissed off
12. I've seen ALOT of movies
13. I have brothers but was raised mostly as an only child
14. I have a thing for electronic gadgets
15. I've liked the same guy for FOUR years
16. I'm a commitmentphobe
17. I have a rare turtle
18. I prefer Black and White pictures
19. I'm afraid to try hard drugs
20. Secretly, I like dressing up in pretty dresses
21. I sleep with a teddy bear
22. I believe in ghosts

YES WE CAN be random

You cant handle the truth

2009-03-30T19:38:00.000-07:00

Whazzup?! Remember that? If not check it out..

I picked that version cuz Laz Alonso made a lil' cameo there at the end..and we all know how much I heart Laz (and if you dont know now ya know..)
I was totally about to post about this disturbing situation I had this evening but upon further inspection, now that my blog is no longer private and anyone can just wander through, I've decided to censor it so that I dont incriminate my self or others in the process. LOL! So. Nothin happened. Nothing..at all...If you want to know PM me and I'll share the info with you lol!

In the meantime "yes we can" tell lies and all that shit lol!

Fuck up List

2009-03-13T23:23:00.000-07:00

I forgot to post about the heffa at the ATM who broke it this afternoon. I was in a rush cuz I had forgot my insurance payment was due and AAA dont be playin about they money. They will qut yo ass..fa real. I called and told them I was gonna be two days late with a payment and they told me that not only were they going to send my payment through once it bounced they were gonna send it back and THEN cancel my policy! WHAT THE HELL?! Anyway, I rushed out to the ATM and in front of me stood Keisha in all her Friday glee.

Like this but with more Baby Phat swagger. Now boys and girls, what would she be doing to piss me off other than breathing Gods good air? Was it
A. Talking on the phone REALLY LOUD
B. Textin someone, prolly her baby's daddy while arbitrarily pressing buttons on the machine
C. Rummaing through her purse like it didnt belong to her
D. All of the above?
YES! You guessed it ALL OF THE ABOVE! What the peach cream? She was killing me HARDLY! She was so loud I couldnt hear the cries of my soul as I squashed it's plan to bash her head in with a bottle of windshield wiper fluid. Then she hangs up the phone and starts TEXTING?! What.the.fuck? While she's texting she starts randomly tapping buttons and takes out like 200 American dollars..over THREE transactions. WHAT WHAT WHAT?! Why didnt she just do it all at once? Then she starts digging in her Baby Phat purse and counting money like she didnt know how much she needed! Then she wanders away because the machine is broken and then walks back to it looking dazed. I REALLY wanted to kill her. Instead I went inside, before she could gather the brain power to make the same decision, and made my transaction in like 3 minutes! Whoever you were, I hate your dreams and ambitions.
This is for you

Yes We Can (bother the hell out of me)

Silverfish

2009-03-13T22:46:00.000-07:00

I for the first portion of my life was pretty much a tom-boy. I was raised with three older brothers and their friends. Not to mention my mom being a life long tom-boy her damn self. Dont believe me peep exhibits A and B:

A.

B.

Look at that HAIR! What the hell was she thinking?! And the platform white kicks with the 99? What you know about that?! LOL! *
I digress...
I played sports and hung out with the boys and even played the instrument least frequented by girls, the french horn, in band. There were just two things I refused to do. 1. Get dirty and 2. Be in the vicinity of bugs. Bugs creep me the HELL out! All of them. Even ants. I hate them. When I was younger I'd RUN, like take off like I was at the blocks, at the sight of bugs. I understand they have a purpose but I'ts not in my life. When we moved to this house there were a crapload of Centipedes here. A crapload! For those of you who dont know what this UNGODLY looking creature is BEHOLD!

I almost threw up finding this picture. Sersly.

The straw that broke the frickin camels back was when one ran past me while I was sitting on the floor! What kind of household do you live in where you cant even sit on the damn floor undisturbed? HUH?! I quickly called Orkin and they've been coming ever since.

like this but cooler

He got rid of all my bugs and we continue to pay him. So why in the hell did I just kill a silverfish kickin it on my platform bed! WHAT THE FUCK?! This is not okay! For those who dont know what these bitches look like BEHOLD..AGAIN!

They're like Centipedes lil cousins so I understand why it could be in the house BUT WHY THE FUCK WAS IT ON MY BED?! They frequent bath tubs and sinks for the water..MY WOODEN BED HAS NO WATER ON IT!
Oh shit. It just occured to me that I leave glasses of water on my night stand overnight. What if it lived in one? Oh God. I have to go throw up.

YES WE CAN (kill bugs)
* I grew out of it! It just took me a decade or so.

blogging while drunk

2009-03-11T20:47:00.000-07:00

Hola,
I know, I know baby, it's been a while.. I've been extra busy lately and I at least tried to post some things right? RIGHT? Anywho, Life has been super so lets update kay?

Yeah, my mom has a New, Newer, Newest boyfriend. He's a simpleton like Forrest.Rather Bubba from Forrest. And his breath smells. And he didnt graduated high school, not even middle school. And he's unemployed. And thats all I have to say about that.

I've become a twitter addict. I blame diddy.

*
This is my new Bestie Jamie! Say hello! I love her, she makes me smile. Also, she's one of the few people on earth I feel actually understands my comedy so yeah. SHES A KEEPER!

There are many more things that have changed including my Wii Fit scolding me, what the fuck?, but this booze is kicking in and that Anthony Hamilton is calling my name! Listen for yourself!

Can we be in love with singers we will never meet?
YES WE CAN!

*That is HER picture, that she took HERSELF! I didnt do it!

EXactly.

2008-12-13T19:51:00.001-08:00

For that one guy

16 random things

2008-12-08T21:58:00.000-08:00

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 16 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 16 people to be tagged.
You have to tag the person who tagged you.

1. Some of you may know this and some of you may not but I am in love with cheese. It is my favorite food of all.frickin.time! It makes my heart sing. When I go to my grandparents house the first thing they ask is if I want some cheese, everyday, without fail. I blame my grandfather because when I was a kid he'd sit with me on the porch and feed me Kraft singles. Yummy the memories!

2. Though loud as all get out with people I know, I'm kind of shy around strangers. I believe in feeling people out before speaking to them.

3. Along with Emma, I talk to myself. I think it's a sign of genius... or extreme selfishness. One of the two. I don’t think some of my thoughts are appropriate for friends. That’s all. I too talk to inanimate objects, but I also appropriate feelings for them. For instance "are you sad Mr. Book? I didn’t mean to smoosh your cover." or "Mr. Coat noooooooo!".

4. UT chopped and skrewed me. I went to go apply for graduation and they told me I had enough for a Science teacher. I dont like teaching. How does this help me? I have talked to my advisor about being a doctor for 4 years! What does she mean!? Nothing to be done about it, but they stroked me. So, not only was I gonna be there another year anyway after needing to take time off when my mom got sick, I'm gonna be here longer to finish up the remaining 14% of my pre-med program. Sweet. I LOVE the idea of having kids at 79! Can you say sextuplets?

5. I have senioritis. Bad. I hate school and everything about it. I have been in some form of school for 20 years. It hurts my soul. The only reason I didnt say f'it after number 4 happened is because I refuse to give those hatin bastards the satisfaction and I will say "CLEAR!" one day damnint! I find it hard to get up and go to class, I feel like that old kid who rides around the high school 3 years after graduation. Gross!

6. I look at peoples shoes. If you know me, I've judged you based on your shoes before. Dont feel bad, I approved, lol! I dont know why, my shoes are nothing spectacular it's just something I always do.

7. I am a music head! I love everything about music. It fills me with joy, no joke. I can play the flute, french horn, piano and now the electric guitar. I want to learn to play the sax and the trumpet sometime next year. If I didnt want to be a doctor, I would surely change my major to music. Music is the great equalizer. It speaks without words. It is one of the few things that brings me to tears on a regular basis. I LOVE IT and you should too!

8. I'm leery of males. In general. No exceptions. Except Jesus.

9. I hate driving with passion and fervor! I hate sitting still for long periods of time. I didnt get my license until I was 21! I had no problem receiving rides. None. My mom did have a problem with this. Hence the license.

10. I am a phantom napper. I've been an insomniac for as long as I can remember so naps are necessary. What sets me apart is that I dont want people to know I nap. I'm not a lazy person and I hate doing nothing. When I'm off work I find meaningless things to fill my time with. So the idea of me sitting around napping and wasting precious daytime minutes kills me! I lie about it sometimes. I cant help it, I'm so ashamed. And wasteful.

11. My mom is my best friend. I dont mean that in some sort of strange cliché way. She is seriously my best friend. I kick it with my mom all the time. She is the person I share my secrets, most of them anyway, with. When that Golden Girls song comes on, I think of her. I love her to pieces!

12. I have a vast knowledge of useless information. Seriously. It is well known that if you want to know something strange and obscure, call Tiara. If I dont know, I'll google it on the spot! I love google. It completes me. I also have a vast knowledge of song lyrics and movie quotes, no not just quotes, movies. Most movies I've seen I am able to quote with surprising accuracy. It's freakish. One of my "friends" calls me the rain man of useless knowledge. I'm so proud.

13. I'm a little afraid of the dark. Not every day downstairs at night dark, creepy basement dark. Sleeping over at a strange new place dark. Coincidently some nights I have to make it pitch black for me to go to sleep. I'm a conundrum.

14. I LOVE ANIMALS! I love them soooo much it's ridiculous. I get really sad when I see a dead animal on the road. I will swerve, within good common sense, to miss squirrels. That Human Society commercial, with the Sheryl Crowe song, makes me cry EVERY TIME! I'm a sucker for them and they know it!

15. I'm tryna get right with Jesus. I must admit that in the last few years I have strayed, considerably, from the path that the Lord has set out for me. I can see the results of what happens when you have come out from under the Lords protection, for instance NUMBER 4!, and am trying very hard to get back. Hell is not a joke! Now, I'm no Kevin Webb, LOL, but I am trying to strengthen my relationship with God.

16. I secretly hate those "above the influence" commercials. Those are dramatic dramatizations! They talk about not letting people rule your life or tell you what to do, but arent they also suggesting what you should do? I dont think that we should pass out weed to the kids, no I know the effects of that and it aint okay, but they should be raised to be strong minded individuals not lead by anything else but their conscious and God.

A battle of wits with an unarmed person

2008-11-22T16:44:00.000-08:00

Text verbatum of an argument I had with a retard; You can tell my parts from his because they are smart!

My response to you can be found at the link below.

----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: Kevin Webb
Date: Nov 20, 2008 12:38 AM

Interesting video of Obama supporters interviewed. Very basic questions were asked of them... in which none of them knew the answers.

This video will show you who voted our next President into office.

YAY!

http://www. kevinwebb22. com/?p=800

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: I dont think I understood the question..
Date: Nov 20, 2008 12:41 AM

I voted our next president into office and I'd like to think I made an educated vote...if you feel different that's fine but let's not sterotype EVERYONE okay? Super!
From: Kevin Webb
Date: Nov 20, 2008 5:48 PM

Hmmm... first of all, the poll and video wasn't produced by me. It was produced by the leading data center in the U.S. Therefore, I'm not stereotyping anybody, just simply spreading already created information.

Secondly, if you are as educated as you claim to be, then why did you vote for Obama?

Third, check my blog out tonight and you'll read about how the stock market has dropped more in just 15 days after Obama's election then it did the entire 9 months previous. Just a coincidence?

No way.

From: I dont think I understood the question..
Date: Nov 20, 2008 11:03 PM

As educated as I “claim to be”? Boy stop! You DON’T know me and just because we attended the same church as kids CLEARLY doesn’t mean you know what I am like. So let’s start at the beginning, I never said that you created the videos that you decided to share with your internet friends. Maybe read my WHOLE comment before you write back next time; By posting this for all your friends to see means that you agree with what it’s promoting, that the people who voted for Obama are uneducated. THAT’S where my comments originated from. Leading Data Center? I watched the video and went to it’s corresponding website where it lead me to John Ziegler’s page. I don’t think he counts as a leading data center. I showed you those videos to pantomime how absurd your video was. We don’t know the situations behind the video and I find it extremely hard to believe that out of all the voters that turned out that day NO ONE knew why they were voting. Have you ever taken statistics? I took it last year and I learned about how polls, without all the information that went into getting the data, are basically useless. This is percentages of people that THEY talked to, not of an entire Nation OR the 63.7 million people who voted for him. It’s sort of like when you watch the news and the find the most ignorant annoying people who have no idea what’s going on to talk to.
So here very quickly are some of the reasons I voted for Obama, leaving out of course that I cant stand McCain because I REALLY wanna discuss something I came across while reading your blog;
1. I am NOT rich. I am a college student and the majority of my family is middle class. I disagree that the wealth in this country is evenly distributed and easily accessible. It has now and has always been reserved for the upper 3% of the nation. I believe that Barack Obama is more in a position to change this than McCain
2. Though I support our troops, I STRONGLY disagree with the war in Iraq. We should NEVER have been there and John McCain is willing to spend the next TEN years there. I am NOT.
3. Two Words; Universal Healthcare
4. Global Warming in NOT a joke, it’s happening as we speak and if we don’t protect the planet God gave us we don’t have anywhere else to go.
5. McCain gives me the heeby jeebies, I know I said I wouldn’t discuss that I don’t like him but he does. He really BOTHERS me.
Those are just five of my reasons for voting for Obama, I’d write more but I’m REALLY taken aback by something you have on your blog. I read it like you suggested and would LOVE to know how your “experience” with black people leaves you qualified enough to honestly write some garbage about the black experience in the US. Now, I like to think that I, for the most part, am open minded. We are all God’s children, but I would NEVER attempt to tell you about the white experience in America because I’M NOT WHITE.
“One thing that bothers me is when I meet black people that are stuck in the past of slavery, which was an obvious bad era and terrible mistake in American history. They actual enslave themselves and chain themselves to their past. The worst case is when I find a person who feels this way, and doesn’t even know the history of slavery.
There are even people who argue that it is ok for black people to feel this way, yet they argue that America will always be a racist country. Listen, stop living in a mental state of slavery and give it up! Move ON! The majority of America has. Stop stooping down the stupid white people who are still wishing slavery back into existence. IT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!
In some way, I feel that some black people are actually racists towards themselves. They live as if they are preparing for slavery to resurface.”

Just the fact that you titled a section “black people and success, do the mix?” annoys me. Now, I’m going to try and remain calm and NOT go postal. You are trying to tell me that we should, what, FORGET slavery? Pretend it never existed? Act like there aren’t still ENTIRE groups of people dedicated to the beliefs that I am less than a person? It’s ludicrous! You NEVER forget the history of your people because when you forget it will repeat itself. The majority of America has not or this section of your blog WOULDN’T exist. “racist towards themselves?” We don’t have to be, we have enough people to do that for us. I lived in our beautiful south for most of my childhood and let me share some of the joys of that time period;
I have been called a nigger by kids my age who didn’t even know what it meant; I have had THREE houses defaced with racist remarks, I’ve been attacked by members of a racist organization, I’ve been followed out of states. Maybe those are just MY experiences right? Maybe I asked for it even, what about this; There is an actual TOWN in existence right now with a sign that says “Niggers don’t let the sun set on your backs” in this town complete with a picture of a very stereotypical black male running; Jena 6;.They are STILL LYNCHING people! At UT on November 15th I was told by white people, The niggers won, I bet you’re glad, I just don’t want the lower class black taking over the world.
I know that this isn’t headline information to you, why would it be? Racism STILL exists and it will as long as there are ignorant people and there are an abundance of them running around pro-creating. The attitude that you have is the reason that racism is prevalent. People can do what they want and no one will believe that it actually happened because racism doesn’t exist right? Yeah, you know everything, you’re right

As educated as I “claim to be”? Boy stop! You DON’T know me and just because we attended the same church as kids CLEARLY doesn’t mean you know what I am like. So let’s start at the beginning, I never said that you created the videos that you decided to share with your internet friends. Maybe read my WHOLE comment before you write back next time; By posting this for all your friends to see means that you agree with what it’s promoting, that the people who voted for Obama are uneducated. THAT’S where my comments originated from. Leading Data Center? I watched the video and went to it’s corresponding website where it lead me to John Ziegler’s page. I don’t think he counts as a leading data center. I showed you those videos to pantomime how absurd your video was. We don’t know the situations behind the video and I find it extremely hard to believe that out of all the voters that turned out that day NO ONE knew why they were voting. Have you ever taken statistics? I took it last year and I learned about how polls, without all the information that went into getting the data, are basically useless. This is percentages of people that THEY talked to, not of an entire Nation OR the 63.7 million people who voted for him. It’s sort of like when you watch the news and the find the most ignorant annoying people who have no idea what’s going on to talk to.”

Kevin’s Response:
First of all, I never knew we attend the same church. Sorry that I don’t remember you.
Secondly, you are mistaken again concerning the poll. The poll was conducted fairly by the top international poll conducting company called Zogby. Your research was insufficient and inadequate. John hired Zogby to conduct the poll, but the poll was not actually conducted by him. Zogby has a clear scientific method of polling that can be found by doing some more research on their website. They are a politically independent company. Please try again.

Poster:
“So here very quickly are some of the reasons I voted for Obama, leaving out of course that I cant stand McCain because I REALLY wanna discuss something I came across while reading your blog;”

“1. I am NOT rich. I am a college student and the majority of my family is middle class. I disagree that the wealth in this country is evenly distributed and easily accessible. It has now and has always been reserved for the upper 3% of the nation. I believe that Barack Obama is more in a position to change this than McCain”

Kevin’s Response:
What is rich? My wife and I together make far less than $100,000 a year. I can’t give specifics because I believe it is unethical to do so in this type of arena. To many people, $30,000 would be considered rich. To many others, they would consider that poor. I currently work 2 jobs totalling about 70 hours a week on average and I typically get about 4-5 hours of sleep a night. My wife also works full-time, but she gets far more sleep than I do! We paid over $4,000 in donations and gifts last year alone and we have no kids to use for tax breaks. Add it all up and we’re just your typical D.I.N.Ks working hard to stay alive. I grew up in a middle class family. My mother worked full-time her entire life, and my dad worked anywhere from 50 to 80 hours a week depending on what the church had going on. I applaud his work ethic.

With that said, regardless of my financial status, I believe that it is the principals behind spreading the wealth that are unethical and unbiblical. You see, Jesus left it to the people to provide asisstance to other people in need. He never suggesting that the government imposed on the people of higher incomes to do so. This is the sole reason that the “church” exists. My church in particular does community outreaches on a regular basis. We provide supplies, food, toys, Christmas gifts, shelter, financial classes and job workshops for those in need.

Why should someone like myself working 70 hours a week be demanded to help support the people who are either not working at all, or only working 40 hours a week? Please tell me the ethics behind taking money from someone who has EARNED it and giving it to someone who HAS NOT EARNED it? There is no proper explanation.

Obama’s proposed tax plan is going to hurt what you call the “rich” more than it is going to help what you call the “middle-class”. What’s his big payoff? You can expect an increase in pay by about $.06 an hour. So, if you currently make $10 an hour you’ll now be making $10.06 an hour. Hope that helps you out. A person making over $250,00 will now be taxed to the point of having to close down. Don’t believe me? Have you seen the fear in the stock market lately due to the election of Obama? Did you know that on average, Republicans donate more money annually than Democrats? Did you know that I out-donated Joe Biden last year? Yep, he donated $3,000 TOTAL LAST YEAR. You voted for him.

Poster:
“2. Though I support our troops, I STRONGLY disagree with the war in Iraq. We should NEVER have been there and John McCain is willing to spend the next TEN years there. I am NOT.”

Kevin’s Response:
Did you know that the majority of the American troops world-wide that have had war tours support and condone the cause and the wars they are fighting? If that is the case, and you support them, then how do you not support the war? Have you forgotten that since 9/11 America has not had a terrorist attack on U.S. soil in over 7 years, even though there have been many attempts? How can you support “spread the wealth” to those who need more money, but not support “spread the freedom” to those who have lived their lives in captivity under a violent government regime? How can you explain your position on this? It doesn’t add up. Your points are contradicting themselves.

Poster:
“3. Two Words; Universal Healthcare”

Kevin’s Response:
Ha. Universal Health Care is actually three words! You watched Joe Biden too much.

This is actually going to do 2 things. First, it will deny basic healthcare to those that fall outside of the definition of “healthcare”. From the sounds of it, this is one of those things that you probably haven’t done any research on. You see… “healthcare” has a term of definitions and clauses that affect it. Coughs, cancer and heart attacks might be considered under the universal healthcare system, but hip replacement, facial reconstruction, dental work, broken bones and certain medications may not. The problem is that these terms are not defined yet. People just RAN TO THE TERM “UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE” without fully understanding it.

Secondly, doing this will create a backlog of patients that will, in time, deny or postpone any care they need to receive. Have you ever seen a line when something is being given away for free? I do think that there are better ways that what we are currently using to help in this area, but handing it out for free is not the answer. Again, who is going to pay for it? You are. I am.

Poster:
“4. Global Warming in NOT a joke, it’s happening as we speak and if we don’t protect the planet God gave us we don’t have anywhere else to go.”

Kevin’s Response:
COME ON! There is absolute scientific proof that the man-made carbon foot print produced has not succeeded the natural carbon foot print to point that it could change weather patterns. In my opinion, believing this is doubting God. He has created the heavens and the earth with such perfection and detailed calculation that if we were to “mess it up” to the point of doomsday he would only have two choices to make; return to gather us for the rapture, or miraculoiusly fix it. If that is the case, then why is this an issue?

Poster:
“5. McCain gives me the heeby jeebies, I know I said I wouldn’t discuss that I don’t like him but he does. He really BOTHERS me.”

My Response:
I find it extremely hard to swallow and digest the fact that you have completely overlooked the issues on abortion, gay rights and welfare. As a Christian, how are these issues not important to you? [all I can do is shake my head in disgust]

Poster:
“Those are just five of my reasons for voting for Obama, I’d write more but I’m REALLY taken aback by something you have on your blog. I read it like you suggested and would LOVE to know how your “experience” with black people leaves you qualified enough to honestly write some garbage about the black experience in the US. Now, I like to think that I, for the most part, am open minded. We are all God’s children, but I would NEVER attempt to tell you about the white experience in America because I’M NOT WHITE.”

“One thing that bothers me is when I meet black people that are stuck in the past of slavery, which was an obvious bad era and terrible mistake in American history. They actual enslave themselves and chain themselves to their past. The worst case is when I find a person who feels this way, and doesn’t even know the history of slavery.”

“There are even people who argue that it is ok for black people to feel this way, yet they argue that America will always be a racist country. Listen, stop living in a mental state of slavery and give it up! Move ON! The majority of America has. Stop stooping down the stupid white people who are still wishing slavery back into existence. IT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!”

“In some way, I feel that some black people are actually racists towards themselves. They live as if they are preparing for slavery to resurface.”

Kevin’s Response:
You’ve sadly misunderstood everything that I said. I understand that black people went through slavery many, many years ago and that racism is still around today. I don’t however believe that it should be used as an excuse (by white people or black people) to determine their future. I highly suggest you go back and read some more of my posts about this. You will find that I was evenly displeased as to how both whites and blacks have treated this issue. AND I’m not by any means talking about the majority of white people, or the majority of black people feeling or acting this way, I was simply mentioning it because these issues do still exists today. If they didn’t then I would not have written about it.

The fact is that there are still stupid white people that hate other races and believe that they are superior, just as there are stupid black people that hate other races and use their past as an excuse to not fulfill their future. There is nothing racist about this comment. It is just the facts.

Poster:
“Just the fact that you titled a section “black people and success, do the mix?” annoys me. Now, I’m going to try and remain calm and NOT go postal. You are trying to tell me that we should, what, FORGET slavery? Pretend it never existed? Act like there aren’t still ENTIRE groups of people dedicated to the beliefs that I am less than a person? It’s ludicrous! You NEVER forget the history of your people because when you forget it will repeat itself. The majority of America has not or this section of your blog WOULDN’T exist. “racist towards themselves?” We don’t have to be, we have enough people to do that for us. I lived in our beautiful south for most of my childhood and let me share some of the joys of that time period;“

Kevin’s Response:
You read this section wrong on my blog. My title was written to mean that BLACK PEOPLE CAN STILL BE HIGHLY SUCCESSFUL REGARDLESS OF THEIR RACE. You simply read this incorrectly and I apologize if I did not clearly state it.

Poster:
“I have been called a n#@$%* by kids my age who didn’t even know what it meant; I have had THREE houses defaced with racist remarks, I’ve been attacked by members of a racist organization, I’ve been followed out of states. Maybe those are just MY experiences right? Maybe I asked for it even, what about this; There is an actual TOWN in existence right now with a sign that says “N#$%^&@ don’t let the sun set on your backs” in this town complete with a picture of a very stereotypical black male running; Jena 6;.They are STILL LYNCHING people! At UT on November 15th I was told by white people, The n@#$%^& won, I bet you’re glad, I just don’t want the lower class black taking over the world.”

Kevin’s Response:
What is your point? I know that this stuff still exists. If you would read more of my posts you would see that I have also encountered white people just like this, speaking disrespectfully and hateful towards black people AND I DID NOT PUT UP WITH IT. I argued with them until I was red and to the point almost losing my insanity because of their racism. Ask anyone down here that knows me and they will tell you that I advocate daily against racist white people… and trust me they run rampid here in Georgia.

Poster:
“I know that this isn’t headline information to you, why would it be? Racism STILL exists and it will as long as there are ignorant people and there are an abundance of them running around pro-creating. The attitude that you have is the reason that racism is prevalent. People can do what they want and no one will believe that it actually happened because racism doesn’t exist right? Yeah, you know everything, you’re right”

Kevin’s Response:
Again, you are proving yourself uneducated or uninformed… one of the two. It’s clearly obvious that you have not read all of my posts concerning these issues and until you do, there really is no reason in arguing with you on them. Go to the top of my blog and clock the tab labeled “Controvery”… I believe you’ll find them in there

Tiara 22/11/2008 You’re a funny guy, Kevin.
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Sure, why not. I noticed that instead of commenting on the way that the results were obtained you chose to focus on Zogby. Super. A quick search of your favorite poller shows that more often than not, Zogby is wrong. Maybe you shouldn’t have given me that info to work with? Who knows, either way, We STILL don’t know the information behind the polls and I STILL don’t believe that the millions of people who voted don’t know why they did. You need more people. By the way, you “friended” me on myspace, not the other way around, so sorry I thought you knew me, calm down skipper.
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I never said you WERE rich, it’s called reading comprehension, and quite frankly I don’t care how many hours a week you or your wife, who I’m sure is a lovely person, work. 30,000 considered rich? Where? In the US the poverty level for your average nuclear family, you know wife; husband; 2 kids; small dog?, is around 24,000. Maybe you should have worked those figures out again, that’s right you’re probably too tired from your 70 hour work week. I agree with you, I think people who don’t work at all need more initiative. If I work over 40 hrs a week and still go to school full time so can they! But what about people who aren’t in our position? People who work at Burger King and make minimum wage? Even working 50 hrs a week is NOT going to make a dent in the growing costs of EVERYTHING. Listen, I don’t care HOW MUCH you or Joe Biden donated last year, because I, who makes less than you donated more. Get over it. I don’t understand your question about taking from someone who earns and giving to someone who didn’t. Are you confused about something there? Come on fear because Obama is causing the stock market to crash? Really!? The lowest drop we’ve seen since 9/11 happened in September. WOW! You guys might wanna go to church and sign up for the prophecy ministry because you must of known he was gonna be elected!
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Where’d ya get that poll from? Zogby? Anywho, Supporting, praying for and wishing the safe return of the men and women doing their jobs is not the same as blindly following their thoughts and opinions. HAHAHHA! YOU DID GET THAT FROM ZOGBY! I was just playing too! LOL! You STILL need more people. Also, that seven year thing doesn’t impress me considering that before 9/11 the last terrorist attack on US soil was in 1993. I got that one from the government. Go figure. Uh oh! My 8 years tops your 7! My points contradict themselves? How? The people who we are trying to force into freedom have made it clear that they DON’T WANT US THERE! Maybe we should follow suit.
*********************************************************
You’re right. Universal Health Care is three words. That AUTOMATICALLY makes your point correct, oh wait, no it doesn’t! I noticed you said “may” a lot. Could it be that, you DON’T know either? I don’t have a problem paying for healthcare for people who need it. Sorry.
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Thanks for your opinion on that, Maverick. Too bad I didn’t ask for it. Did you even read the bulletin like I suggested? Didnt think so.
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Again, did you even read my letter!? See now this makes ME shake MY head in disgust. I read your blog, which I didn’t really want to do. As a matter of fact, everything you talk about that was in that letter, I refuse to comment on…starting….now!
**********************************************************
blah blah blah I still dont think you are the authority on a race youre not. blah blah blah
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Apology accepted
***********************************************************
What is my point? My point is exactly what it says if you aren’t bright enough to figure it out, I don’t think I’m gonna waste the time trying to explain it to you. Hey guys, hand claps for Kevin Not putting up with it! WHOO! Get that man a cookie!
*********************************************************
Uneducated? More like I cant argue with her point so I’ll try to discredit the writer. There you go again with name calling. Sorry Kevin, it appears we got off on the wrong foot. I don’t care about how you feel about…well anything. You were just starting to annoy me with your CONSTANT posts on myspace basically whining and groaning about something that already happened. I actually only responded back with this one because I think it’s funny that you took a private discussion that we were having and posted it on your blog. So I HAD to do the same. I’m spiteful that way. So you go on being a Maverick and reppin John McCain to the fullest and I’m going to work on, you know, living. Hey have fun kid.
P.S. I’m not interested in reading your blog, just like John McCain, it gives me the heeby jeebies. Shake your head in disgust about that!
Love all around
Tiara
admin 22/11/2008 The fastest way to be discredited is to continue to put uneducated information somewhere that remains built on a lack of research. You have a clear misunderstanding of fact and fiction.
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I haven’t even read your entire post, I just skimmed it and found many falsehoods. One of them being the last terrorist attack date happening in 1993, which if I remember correctly was attack #1 on the towers. That is incorrect. I am pretty sure that the last terrorist attack happened on April 19th, 1995. It happened in Oklahoma. Go Google it and prove yourself wrong.
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Hey guys clap for Tiara if she can finally get something correct and you’ll never clap again!
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When you decide to actually do some research (yet again), then please let me know so that we can continue our debate. Your Zogby stuff is still off too.
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I’d write more, but I’m off to a gun show to exercise my Second Amendment right (which is part of the Bill of Rights) while I still have the chance to.

Tiara 22/11/2008 LOL! Well, your comments were….predictable. Except the gun show thing, thanks for sharing your free time activities with me. Oh, you’re still wrong about the year issue, I checked again. The Oklahoma City Bombing, though tragic, is not considered an act of terrorism according to the state departments website. And now you know and knowing is half the battle!

Realest ish I never wrote

2008-11-19T23:42:00.001-08:00

Dear Internet friends and family,
Greetings and salutations! It is a beautiful new day in this our United States of America. A person of color and a myriad of backgrounds has been voted by a nation stifled with oppression its ruler. Who thought that this day would come? Come on be honest! Alright…who thought it’d come this soon? Yeah, me neither. I remember when my mother would tell me that I could be the first black/woman president and here we are arriving at this historic moment decades before we thought we would! The joy that we should feel is gargantuan in nature! The elation should echo across the states but it doesn’t. Instead of celebrating this monumental event that should bind us together here we stand, divided. Now, this letter by no means is for all of us. There are some of us who have heard the call of equality and answered in loud voice, YES WE CAN! Still, there are others who let issues rooted in ignorance and lies rule their minds and it is to these people that I wish to speak this morning.
To say that race is not an issue in this election is to say that race is not an issue in our country. We all know that this is unequivocally false. So why not address it head on okay? Barack Obama is African, English, Irish and German. He has lived in the U.S (including Hawaii) as well as Indonesia. So yes, your President is black, but he’s also White. SO WHAT? Does this make him any more or less qualified for his position? I think the most annoying thing about this campaign has been people claiming to not care about race, offering up their usual I have three black friends qualifier, and then jumping immediately into a tirade about RACE and completely ignoring the politics! Just stop it..let it go! While I’m on this topic let’s address the racist jokes/e-mails I received November 15th and here’s a surprise; only two were from white people. Shocking? No, not really.
1. You better get you some water cuz it’s about to be a whole lot of salty crackers walking around
2. All white people must report to the cotton fields tomorrow morning at 7am for orientation
3. The statue of liberty is coming down today; aunt jamima is going up holding a chicken leg.
4. Breaking News! Obama is tearing up the Rose Garden in the white house and replacing it with a watermelon patch.
I received at least four more but these are just the ones I got over and over and over again. Seriously? I challenge my special friends who sent this to take some time out and go talk to your grandparents. I did. Do you know what they expressed? Joy. Pure, unabashed joy. These people KNOW what it’s like to struggle. They know what it’s like to be so oppressed they feel that there is no future for them or their own. These people are the ones who lived through the civil rights clinging to the hope that their grandchildren would have a better future and not one of these people sent me a message of hate or prejudice. That came from my generation, and while I agree that the struggle continues I also agree that we need to stop perpetuating the hate and conduct ourselves with the dignity of our ancestors and future leader.
Next on the list is our McCain supporter friends. For the most part, I’m proud of you. You guys were going all out to get McCain in office, and though I disagree with your decision making process, I respect our differences. So, how about we get over it already? Stop posting stupid references about Marxist humor and Socialist policies, we get it, you’re clever. Stop talking about moving to Canada or the Netherlands, if you had the funds to do that you’d of left years ago. Stop posting stupid videos that claim we don’t know who we voted for. Stop using MySpace and facebook as your personal crying grounds. Here’s what ya need to do; take a bubble bath. Breathe in those healing aromas and then cry into your pillow. When you feel you’ve gotten it all out, join the rest of us and help rebuild this damn country. Seriously though Obama is your next president, stop whining and get with the program.
The next section is for the conspiracy theorist in us all. Barack Obama is NOT the anti-Christ. I repeat BARACK OBAMA IS NOT THE ANTI CHRIST! Just like all great leaders Obama has inherited this title joining the ranks of Mahatma Gandhi; The newest Pope and John F. Kennedy. You see how well THOSE panned out for ya? I was going to dissect this argument piece by piece but to avoid offending anyone and their religion I declined to. If you WOULD like a dissection of this argument and where it FAILS HORRIBLY by all means, write me and I will shoot one out to ya, in the meantime I suggest spending some time in prayer with God. Talk to him, ask to be guided and he will show you the truth. Along with this argument are the “I didn’t vote for Obama because I don’t want my soul to go to hell” crew. How dare you assume you understand the reasons a nation voted. Judge not least ye be judged! Everyone who voted for Barack Obama aren’t godless, homosexual sinners who wallow in wrongness waiting for the day that the next baby will be slaughtered. I am a Christian and I stand strong in my beliefs. I love the Lord with all my heart and soul and no one will tell me different. I have no reason to question Obama’s salvation or his walk with the Lord and neither do you. Whereas I don’t agree with abortions I believe the ramifications of that decision lie within that woman who does and God. He granted us free choice for a reason. GAY RIGHTS AND ABORTIONS ARE NOT THE ONLY THINGS GOD DISAGREES WITH! I challenge all of you to take a step down of the high horse and reflect on your own lives. How many things would God want for you to remove from your heart? Now how many of those things are you ready, really ready, to give up. The Bible says there is no weight on sin, you better believe it. What about protecting our planet that God gave us? What about helping the poor and sick? What about LOVING our neighbors whether homosexual or not? What about PEACE on earth? Let’s focus on all the issues involved and not just the one’s it’s easy to argue.
In closing, this letter was not meant to offend, this was not my intention. If it did I would challenge you to question yourself about why it did. If it hit too close to home it’s never too late to get on my level. For my lovely friends who already did YES WE DID!
Love all around,
Tiara
P.S. Not to be rude but I’m not interested in arguing with you about these topics. If I wanted your opinion I would have asked for it. Kay? Thanks!

So this one time....

2008-11-14T19:06:00.000-08:00

There was a post here, but I hid it
management
YES WE CAN and all that jazz

It's been forever!

2008-11-07T18:14:00.000-08:00

I've been saying I was gonna post here for MONTHS! I just havent had the time, those out there in blogger world know how it is and what's up! School has started again and I am halfway through this semester...it's easier than usual..I'm worried. So much crap has happened, let's discuss!

1. I turned 23!

Year of the Jordan

I am offically GROWN! I dont know why but I have always thought that 23 means you are officially adult and what now! Granted you can go to big people jail but people actually think you can have intelligent convo with them! I am so excited. For my recent age change I re-did my room. Yeah, new paint, furniture, set up it's hot like fire! Then I cop'ed an all new wardrobe. Oh yeah I realized while re-doing my room that I have 32 t-shirts that say things. THIRTY TWO! Can you believe that? They are cute and I like them but it was time to move on. Thennnn I cut my hair! That's right my hair that I have been growing for years, the hair that was slowly creeping down my back, chopped off to chin lenght. I miss it..badly! I cant wait for it to grow back.

2. BARACK OBAMA!

I have SERIOUS Obama fever! I was so thrilled when he was elected I didnt know what to do with myself! I campaigned for him for months and to see it come to pass was amazing! We are taught from a young age to not expect much out of life and to be happy with what were given. We are told we can be anything we want to be with a few expectations and this is supposed to be enough. Today though, I honestly believe these things. I honestly believe that my potential is limitless and you should too! YES WE DID!

I gotta go do some actual homework so I have to go. Hey, how about some Young Jeezy to ease the pain of parting?

I'm officially changing my slogan to YES WE CAN!

Summertime

2008-06-02T21:05:00.000-07:00

Yeah, SOOOOOOO
It's been a long ass summer and it's only been a month. This will be a short post because I am currently typing this while looking over my shoulder. There is a very large, very resiliant spider in my room somewhere. I threw everything within reaching distance at it and the bitch wouldnt die. I mean CD'S, DVD's, books, turtle food, clothing, shoes, bottles, a Rubik's cube, lotion and a deck of cards and it still wouldnt leave. Finally I found a bottle of Lysol and sprayed it over and over again. It's STILL alive and running around and I will not, I repeat WILL NOT rest until the bitch is dead. Holla.

GO TO CHURCH!

Now with more creme filling!

2008-04-24T16:13:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I havent written here in like 8 months so what? Whhhaaaat ya gon' do about it? Nothin son, nothin! I realize that was overly rude for no apparent reason. I'm very sorry. This whole pre-med thing has been kicking me in the glutes! I've been in school for a year straight without a break. We're gonna put an end to that ASAP. I still got another week and then yeah, you guessed it, I wont have anything to do but write here and annoy....no..one........Until then

GO TO CHURCH!

Sigh

2007-08-31T18:53:00.000-07:00

I am so ANNOYED! I'll talk later..for now watch this.

The fuck up list

2007-08-28T20:35:00.000-07:00

Occasionaly people or places do something so bad, so inconceivable that they deserve a special place in my world. That place is "The Fuck Up List". "The Fuck Up List" is a list of all the people, places and things that have fucked up. Number one tonight is

5/3 bank. You would think I would have trouble talking bad about this fuck up lister considering my significant other, for right now, is an employee at this financial institution. I do not. I hate them with all the vim and vigor my tiny little heart can muster. I joined the bank in 05 with my mom because it had a free checking account and all of their machines are convenient and....EVERYWHERE! Little did I know this bank sucks hot ass. Lemme give you an example...
Thursday: My dog has emergency surgery, I write a check for $400 dollars.
Friday: Payday, as I went shopping and paid a bill I dont have $400 dollars in that account. Considering that transactions deposited past Friday at 5 dont post until Monday at midnight I figure I'm o.k with depositing the money the next day.
Saturday:I move $577 over to the account topping it off to a whopping $590. I should be fine with a whole $19 left in the account. I go and buy pepcid for my dog, beverages and lunch. OOOPS! I charged my account over .90.
Monday: I deposit $3 dollars on my way to work thinking I'm fine.
Tuesday: I used a machine from somewhere else whose fee was two dollars and some change result: OVERDRAFTED 15 CENT!
5 minutes ago: I call bank, because it was overdrafted last night I cant go put the change in the bank. Sooooooo because of a 15 cent slip, I owe 58$ on Friday. I.HATE.THEM.
This isnt the first time. Another time they said I owed like $390 dollars. I was like bitch please and they dropped the fees. Most banks charge you $33 one time. NOT THESE FUCK UPS! They charge you $33 FOR EACH TRANSACTION afterwards and considering it takes 4 days for me to get my letter, that could be alot.
So...5/3 you are offically on THE FUCK UP LIST. Congratulations you assclowns.

GO TO CHURCH

Mama...I hurt.

2007-08-23T19:04:00.000-07:00

YELLO! It has been THE longest week of my life! I left my old job at the Y (:() where I made little to no money to go to my new job at a rental car agency where I make twice of what I made before. Hoorary right? No. Not hooray. Let's discuss.

REASONS MY NEW JOB, THOUGH PROFITABLE, SUCKS ASS.

1. Smokers. 98% of the people who work at my job smoke. GAG ME. I can't stand smoke since my mother stopped smoking when I was a kid. She was messing with my chronic bronchitis and my brothers asthma so she was you know...obligated to. I think she still resents it. I kid, I kid. However, smoking is still "fucking nasty, bitch" thanks facebook. Not only do these people smoke, they take 5 minute smoking breaks every 20-30 min. I'm there well over 8 hours. I dont feel like doing the math but this is quite frankly disgusting.

2. Age. I just left a job where all the workers were between the ages of 20 and 31 to go to a job where all the workers are between the ages of almost 22 (me) and late 60ish. There are five chicks at the desk, me, a late 50'ish woman,a 47 year old, a 35 year old, a 34 year old and a 31 year old. All the guys that do the hard work, cleaning and shuttleling are around 50-60. IMAGINE our conversations. I almost threw up when they started talking about their fondness of president Bush. siiiggggghhhhhh. The above picture could have been taken at work if that little girl was a.) black and well, that's the only qualifier.

3.Gossip. This is crazy. All of these older, wiser women totally being crotches to each other. I mean within my first day of filling out paper work, not even working there mind you, I learned that one of the girls is a hypochondriac, the other is a quietly vicious old beast, one is a worry wart who has financial issues and the other has autistic kids. I didnt even know this chick! Then they say I'm too quite. Because I dont want my business all over the damn building! All of their friends call and stop by too. This wouldnt be so bad if these were normal people. As they arent it's actually quite unbearable. Here's a nice big steaming cup of shut the fuck up.

4.Sailors mouths. These old women curse like you wouldnt believe! I have never heard such filth coming out of the mouths of ladies. One flicked a guy off today. SHE.FLICKED.HIM.OFF. I was in total shock. WHO DOES THAT? I know I curse, but not like this. I censor myself a great deal in public, you know, cuz I have home training.

5. Random aches. Since I started I have had the most random pains. My neck and shoulders are super achey and my legs and feet hurt. The hell. I stood on my feet for 8 hours a day 4 days a week and never felt pain like this. I need some help.

6. IT'S BORING! I'm only there 8 hours this week and I'm bored as hell. Imagine my TEN hour shift. No seriously, there is NOTHING to do. I have a game folder with games from the 90's but I can only play it when the boss is out and surprise, surprise I'm training. It is literally like watching paint dry. literally. They painted and I watched it dry.

I have training an hour a way next week. so I'll be gone from 7:30am until 6:00 p.m. Hip Hip hooray!

Also, one of my dogs had to have emergency surgery. Tuesday he had an "let's eat everything we come in contact with" party. He ate a towel, a bag of hot dog buns including the wrapper, he ate a cardbord box, and a mitten. Yes, a mitten. He's been throwing up and having a bad case of the BG's(bubble guts) since then. Today I started getting worried, I'm a tad bit overprotective since my other dog died in November. I took him to the vet and he was whoopin they ass until they sedated him. Turns out he has an obstruction of his small intestines and they have to have emergency surgery or I have to put him down. Tough decision...NOT. So while I'm tryna figure out how I can come up with this money I just wrote a bad check for I'm prayin like you would not believe. I was shaking and stuff. He was o.k. though, she had to push it through to his large intestine and he can hopefully come home tomorrow or Sat. I'M SO EXCITED...AND I JUST CANT HIDE IT! I love my dogs to death and he hasnt been away from us since he was a little baby. I hope he sleeps through the night until I can go see him tomorrow after the boringest job ever. It also only turned out to be half of what they thought it was. HOORAY! I dont have to put on the red light...I kid, I kid.

School sucks. I dont think I'ma have the money to pay for this semester so I dont think I'ma go. I'm hella tired anywayz so a week off should help. I'm only sad that I'm not gonna get to do something I've been waiting years to do. I'd put it here but on the off chance it does happen I dont want any incriminating evidence. Oh wellz. If it was meant to be it'll be, soon. THANKS JAY-Z!

Juanita Bynum got beat the hell down by her husband. This is so sad. What's worse it the way people keep saying that it's her own fault. BULL! Domestic violence is never the victims fault dummies. Please dont let hate get in the way of your own common sense.

Michael Vick. He's a dumbass. I'd write more but I've already written one obligatory blog post about him. I copied it down below. This was after some random said something dumb about it JUST being animals and if he was white we'd let him off etc. etc. etc.:
Maaaaannnnnnnn I was reading these posts getting super hot! What genius would do some idiocy like swerve OFF the road and kill six kids to miss a squirrel? That’s reaching. I'm not gonna attempt to explain what someone else said because I don’t know them so I don’t know what they meant. Here's how I feel about it. Vick is guilty. Guilty for being a cruel, indecent human being. He viciously killed animals that he bought, traded and bred for slaughter. For shame on us for wanting to hold him accountable for his actions. As an animal lover I would swerve to miss the squirrel, but NOT at the cost of human life. It's not a matter of humans over animals, its about not being a jackass. Who can honestly say if they could have avoided killing an animal they wouldn’t have? Not anyone sane. Not even yourself. Animal life should not be placed over human life, but we also shouldn’t go out of our way to kill them unneeded.
I also understand that biblically speaking we were given domain over animals. There are a few other quotes in the bible concerning animals too, here's one:
A good man takes care of his animals, but wicked men are cruel to theirs.
- Proverbs 12:10
Hmmmmm......Maybe that's too much rationalism for some people. Since we are on the bible, isn’t the point of our existence to be exalting God and living our lives as Christ like as possible? Well the bible says:
The Lord is loving and merciful... He is good to everyone and has compassion on all he has made.
- Psalms 145:8-9
ALL HE HAS MADE. He made everything including dogs and squirrels :)
I can understand people saying that if this was a person he'd get off believe you me, I get it. What shocks me is that we say this with such ease. The fact that we are readily able to supply this man with an excuse for his ridiculous behavior is appalling. This is the same man that we let off the hook for infecting people with HERPES! This dude knew he was burnin and was still blessin chicks with the gift that keeps on givin. This is just the beginning of his stupid behavior, middle fingers to fans, not really playing in 05, kicking it with people who had records for drug trafficking. COME ON MAN! He has consistently stupid behavior. It's time Vick grows the hell up. He was man enough to do dumb crap so he needs to be man enough to own up to it. Period.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I'm SO.DAMN.INTELLIGENT! I'm playin,but hey

GO TO CHURCH

siiiiiiiggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh

2007-08-14T20:03:00.000-07:00

I wrote a very long extensive post with pictures about my joy of school ending two weeks ago. Blogger fudged that up. In my anger I have abstained from blogger for a few weeks to mellow out, kinda clear my head from the anger that threatened to erupt onto my Dell. I am calm now. However, I would like to point out that if the blogger ever deletes my extensive posts again I will fuck.it.up. That is all.

I'm gonna GO TO CHURCH

The lost posts

2007-08-05T14:29:00.000-07:00

I wrote some posts I didnt finish a few weeks ago, I shall call them "the losts posts". Here's one now!

I'm back up in this Biaatch! O.K random outburst I know but as school has just ended and I feel like a recently freed slave(at least for two weeks) I am excited! I got a 10 page paper to write tonight but 9 pages of that is gonna be bull and the other one is gonna be a title page. I am full of useless information waiting to escape! So here is my list of things that really pissed me off this summer that I didnt get to write about.
1. That wrestler guy who killed his fam.
You suck.
2. Those two ass clowns that raped and killed that family.
You both suck.
3. Usher and Tameka.
W.T.F? Is he lost in the sauce? I dont believe I understand this one.
4. Chick in Delaware that faked pregnancy.
So, there's this chick in Delaware that was supposedly knocked up with twins by this frat guy. She went around for a good 8 months wearing a fake belly (dodge balls cut in half), getting sympathy for having a triflin baby daddy who questioned paternity, having baby showers and getting all the attention her little lyin ass could muster. So she goes into labor and "loses" the babies. Next day she's on campus walking around kickin it. People get suspicious and raid her room finding the fake bellies. They confront her and lift her shirt to find she has a friggin six pack! THE HELL! Eight months later with labor and you still lookin like you just got off the bowflex? She confesses says she aborted the babies at 6 months and didnt want anyone to know so she just kept faking. This does not explain the other 6 months of no weight gain. She also didnt explain the different month sized dodge balls found in room. There are pictures of her all over the place. Here's some:

Had the nerve to have a shower!

If you see this hoe, kick her in the stomach. It's safe now.

Dag! She needs to
go to church

Drunk driving and other special olympic events

2007-07-02T17:06:00.000-07:00

Soooo. From the title you could probably figure out what I'm gonna say. I had to drunk drive home recently. Let me first start off by saying Drunk Driving is horrible! You put your life and others at risk every second you're behind the wheel.....but what had happened was is this: I go to a party roughly 10 minutes away from my house. I'm only drinking a little so I think I'm o.k. to drive. As the night goes on we play many many games. I get very, very drunk. I dont have a way home besides driving because 1: I have NO money in the bank. All I have is the cash I gave to my mom so I would'nt spend it. 2. My mom is in Detroit for the night. 3. The people at the party are more drunk than I am. 4. The only people I can call are at a party downtown getting drunk. 5. My grandparents are dead sleep as well as my aunt and uncle who live in town. Soooooooooo. I have no choice but to drive home. I did pretty well considering I possess the ability to sober up for like 20 min at a time. No, seriously. I can fake sober for 20 MIN. This is more than enough time to talk to a sober parent,friend or officer; find my keys; call in sick etc. etc. etc. I have a friend who get's drunk like this every few days. She has a problem. No seriously, I think she is an alchi. She blacks out and has started coming to the J-O-B drunk. Today we had to send her home. If my director wasnt a complete DOLT she would have been fired. So the moral of this story.. Dont drink and drive! It's bad. Also,

GO TO CHURCH

Why facebook and myspace are the devil.

2007-06-30T15:55:00.001-07:00

Alright, I'm back. Soooooo I bet lots of random people in blog land are wondering why I switched my site to here. Well, allow me to spin you a tale....

A "friend" of mine that I've know since 10th grade has a picture online with her titty balls almost poppin out. People we know were commenting on said photo. Since I was in the pic, and to draw attention away from herself she comments on me. So since I'm a fool I say that she looks like she's about to say trimspa baby (a reference to Anna Nicole). As this was a joke, I think nothing of it that's until the next day I log on and she has removed me from her friends. So I write and ask why I can't see her profile and she responds with this:

Your comment about Anna Nicole Smith was not only disrepectful to me and way over board, but it was also disrespectful to a deceased woman. And because I knew it would be a waste of my energy trying to explain that to you, I nipped it in the bud. No hard feelings, but I can't call someone "friend" who lacks tact and the ability to be respectful to me. My mother always told me to never try to make someone else look like an ass, because you end up making yourself look like a bigger ass.

WTF? So at first I got pissed and wrote her a letter all about her hypocritical self, then I stopped and realized that to do so would be dropping down to her level so I wrote back this:

Wow, originally I wrote you back an equally loaded letter, and then I remembered I'm an adult. As an adult, I can respect the fact that our ideas of jokes are not similar. As an adult I can also respect the fact that you have chosen to not speak of me as a friend anymore. However, I do not accept you calling me disrespectful and tactless; those are not names you get to use, especially since you have called me, as a woman, out of my name numerous times on this very facet. As a person who used the word "friend" perhaps as a "friend" you should have bought your anger to me instead of around me. "Unfriending" me on facebook and myspace was, as you put it, way over board. As this event has spun completely out of control and I do not wish to engage in high school behavior I will leave it at that. As with you, there are no hard feelings and even if we never speak again, I wish you all good things and hope your future is truly blessed.

Do you see how nice that was? How I expressed my feelings in a womanly way? How I didnt call her a BITCH!? This is what she writes back:
You lack tact and respect for not being okay with opening your mouth. Instead, you chose yo do so in a comment meant to offend me. I have never called you out of your name. Get it straight. It is often human nature to look for some blame to counter, so I understand.
To ASSume that I even knew what you were talking about, joke or not, made and an ASS out of you not me.
Thank you.
Oh, and I'm not angry. I was just shocked that you could be so "ignorant" as you have highlighted on your facebook page--ha! Oh, and don't you fret... your email didn't go over my head, as you lied to someone who posted on your wall. In fact, you never sent me an email to address it; I brought it to you. That, is even funnier. By the way, you're not dealing with someone below you, as you tried to portray in your same comment. So, while you're pointing the finger to call someone ignorant, realize that you are being quite childish and lying to make yourself seem "cool?" Again, lacking tact and respect. I suggest stepping your game up.

WOWZA! For someone not angry it sure seems that way. I love how I wrote her a nice positive adult letter and I get the bitchy AIM response. WOW. At this point in time she pissed me off but the heffa blocked me on facebook, so me being vindictive, I wrote her on myspace.

How clever of you blocking me from messaging you on one outlet and still forgetting the other. I really dont feel like going into all of the conundrums you placed in your messages to me so I'll just start with the ones that are bugging me.
*If you're not angry, quit writing angry notes.
*I never said a comment meant to offend you, on the contrary the Anna Nicole comment was meant to tickle your funny bone, something I'm not going to explain again.
*You've never called me out of my name Autumn? Hmmm.... I believe we got in a little tift last year about you calling me out of my name and me jabbing back too hard in your opinion or perhaps its slipped your mind. I guess Hoe is a different way of saying Tiara.Its cool, you know, human nature. Oh wait, I know, you said it as a joke...which is completely different from what I said. Completely.
*If you're going to use the ASSume reference, please turn it around on yourself . To ASSume that I would know you would be upset or to ASSume that its o.k to call someone a hoe because you're playing really does make an Ass out of you and me.
*Whats the "HA" for, should I be amazed you used someone elses profile to view mine? I KNEW you would. I did send you a message asking why you unfriended me because you chose to keep it a secret. The email you sent was in response to mine, you know, cause and effect?
* When did I say you were below me? Please keep your issues, your issues and not mine. If I thought you were below me I wouldnt have asked why. If I thought you were below me I wouldnt have written you back and if I thought you were below me I would have put stupid instead of ignorant.
*Lying? Again with the name calling! I dont have to lie to make myself seem cooler than a person she has never met. I guess that reading my profile on the low to check for information about yourself seems much cooler, yeah we should all get like you.
I really dont care to discuss this matter any further, I've already taken it past its breaking point writing this letter so you do with it whatever you will.

So as I have already stated I have done, she does what every rational stupid person does and WRITES.ME.BACK!

Tiara Smith, get over yourself and stop talking to me. Obviously this is very important to you, and is bothering you. I never questioned the esteem of myself... you know SELF ESTEEM?! I questioned... yours! Because like I earlier referenced, the need to "crack back" "jabb back" whatever you call it was taught to me as an expression of self doubt, not a reflection of the person it's projected on.
I stopped talking to you on thefacebook because it was not productive. I also evaluated the importance of our "friendship". And sadly enough it added up to be something of little importance to my life. So, I deleted it.
Case closed.
"hoe sit down" is a colloquial phrase... if it offended you last year, I apologized. You forgave, yet you bring it back up(?) The comment on your picture wasn't directed at you; but since you were offended-- I deleted it (there goes that respect and tact shining once again! eureka!).
Please, explain how telling me I was a fat, WHITE woman with large fake breasts [mine are the blessing of my Father; a representation of my HERITAGE] supposed to amuse me... not to mention, she is deceased. I didn't know the woman personally; but, I don't take human life lightly. Again, explain. No, nevermind, because it will take you back to making an ass of yourself.
Again, I rest.

Oh, and for your information, you don't know me. And I saw your page because you messaged me--I clicked the wrong part and landed on your face! Not because I got into someone else's profile. Loser. Not I. Upgrade yourself. Your keyboard courage amuses me.

Resting, finally.

and cut! At this point I got annoyed and wrote her back, then I decided I had had MORE than enough of retarded people online so we blocked each other and moved on. But because I can here's my response:

Wow, keyboard courage, more name calling huh? Had you of answered the phone when I called, you could have heard my phone courage as well.I will say this for the last time.J-O-K-E. If you didnt like it fine. I dont care but dont accuse me of something that is not true. Seeing as before this year we hadn't spoke in over 3 1/2 years I'm not surprised you didnt find our "friendship" worthwhile. WOMP,WOMP. Big breasts a black woman do not make. I dont care about your boobs and I'm tired of talking about them. Deleting a comment off of my picture after the fact, does not make it tact. It makes it risk management. I dont know you? How about that after you block someone, if you click on their face, it doesnt go to their page. It goes to your homepage, because you're BLOCKED! Please, dont test me.
You know what Autumn, for the sake of the argument, let's say you're right. Ring the bells sound the alarms! Hooray all's right in hooville! Since you are right, there should be no need for you to ever talk to me again. Just go be right with yourself.

Yeah. Can you believe ^this^ shit? Had me arguing like a five year old! Anywayz we dont talk anymore and as this big breasted individual had my old blog address, I changed it and made it private. I'll move the stuff over here sometime in the near (or distant) future.

Oh, and Autumn R.W.....

GO TO CHURCH!!!!

Here we are again...

2007-06-24T08:02:00.001-07:00

I moved my blog to this website so that all the people I dont like cant read it. More on that later...If you followed me here and there's something really funny at the old one http://www.ispeakatruth.blogspot.com is wher you can find it.

GO TO CHURCH!